I have to turn a senior quote in for school and dont know where to begin looking, so I thought Id ask you guys bc most of you know of all the little hidden corners or features of the web that most poeple dont even know exist. So anyway I was wondering if anybody had and humours quotes or links to some. Im not looking for something absolutely hilairous like maybe Steve Wright or a humouous quote from a famous person. Thanks!

Happy Hunting!
-Amazingracer

If war protesters don't believe in violence what would they do if we punched them in the nose?

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I have to turn a senior quote in for school

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So you've come to us old folks for help?



~erik~

Wow. This one had me pulling out one of my old yearbooks. Memories, both good and bad, came flooding back.

Here's a few of the quotes that seem to have held up over time:

Doing what you like is freedom; liking what you do is happiness.

Life is wasted on those who cry, but for those who laugh life is thiers for the taking!

Man's flight through life is sustained by the power of his knowledge.

Consider well what your strength is equal to, and what exceeds your ability.

However, my favorite quotes come from the notebooks of Lazarus Long (See Robert A. Heinlein's 'Time Enough for Love'). Two notables are:

Certainly the game is rigged. Don't let that stop you; if you don't bet, you can't win.

A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.

I realize the second is probably *waaaaay* too long, but it is one of my favorites. But as far as I'm concerned, any of the quotes from the notebook are great. Do a Google search for them. They're out there in a lot of places.

Best of luck,

S-4-C

Try quoting Jesus or even the Apostle Paul. Quotes from the Bible seem to ruffle feathers these days. Of course, these will hardly be shocking if you attend a Christian school.

At the risk of labeling myself a geezer, most of my favorite quotes come from either Will Rogers or Mark Twain. Both were genuinely funny men, each with his own unique outlook on life.

My favorite Will Rogers quotes:

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There are 2 theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

There are three kinds of men:
The ones who learn by reading.
The ones who learn by observing.
The ones who pee on the electric fence.

Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft.  Today it's called golf.

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And a few from Mark Twain:

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Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence in society.

Do not tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish.

It is a solemn thought: Dead, the noblest man's meat is inferior to pork.

Is a person's public and private opinion the same? It is thought there have been instances.

It is the foreign element that commits our crimes. There is no native criminal class except Congress.

It is a wise child that knows its own father, and an unusual one that unreservedly approves of him.

It is not likely that any complete life has ever been lived which was not a failure in the secret judgment of the person that lived it.

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(edited to add a couple of good ones I remembered moments after posting.)

--
Scott Johnson (ScottJ)

My favorite ones are the old ones like from Mark Twain.
For Btouch, I go to a christian school. First Presbyterian Day School.
I also remember last seniors class presidents quote, who had been class president all 4 yrs of high schoolIt was something along these lines)
" If you get the fools to believe you, you can be elected to anything."

Happy Hunting!
-Amazingracer

If war protesters don't believe in violence what would they do if we punched them in the nose?

[This message was edited by Amazingracer on August 30, 2003 at 11:45 PM.]

The first one here has been a long time favorite of mine. Enjoy.

Objective evidence and certitude are doubtless very fine ideals to play with, but where on this moonlit and dream-visited planet are they found?
-- William James

Vision without action is a daydream. Action without vision is a nightmare.
-- Japanese proverb

Any idiot can handle a crisis, it's this day-to-day living that wears you out.
-- Anton Chekhov

If you want to build a ship, don't drum up people to collect wood and don't assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea.
-- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

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If you want to build a ship, don't drum up people to collect wood and don't assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea.
-- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

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OK, now you've mentioned Saint-Ex, and as a pilot, I can't believe I forgot him.

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Transport of the mails, transport of the human voice, transport of flickering pictures - in this century, as in others, our highest accomplishments still have the single aim of bringing men together.

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Of course, it's hard to think about Saint-Ex without also thinking of Richard Bach:

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Man is not confined to walk the earth and be subject to its codes. Man is a free creature, with domain over his surroundings, over the proud earth that was his master for so long.

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And in turn, it's hard to think of those two without thinking of a quote from Leonardo Da Vinci:

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When once you have tasted flight, you will forever walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, and there you will always long to return.

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And finally, my favorite Ernest K. Gann line:

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If an airplane is still one piece, don't cheat on it. Ride the bastard down.

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--
Scott Johnson (ScottJ)

"It is not necessary to change. Survival is not mandatory."
- W. Edwards Deming

"If all wishes were gratified, many dreams would be destroyed." - B. Banzai

"Nobody is nobody. Everyone has something to offer." - B. Banzai

"The only reason for time is so that everything doesn't happen at once." - B. Banzai

"Today's impossible is tomorrows reality."

And of course as a computer geek I like

There are 10 types of people in world, those that understand binary and those that don't.

"Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint." = Mark Twain

See ya on the hunt!

My favorite from the Groundspeak Forums:

"Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he'll sit in a boat and drink beer all day." DAVE BARRY

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Originally posted by ScottJ:
My favorite Will Rogers quotes:

quote:

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There are three kinds of men:
The ones who learn by reading.
The ones who learn by observing.
The ones who pee on the electric fence.

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So true!
Reminds me of a comic I heard the other day. He was talking about a slow learning farmhand. As the tail goes, one of the farm machines jambed and sure enough the farmhand lost his hook trying to unjam it.

www.westegg.com/nash
Ogden Nash is one of my favorites for funny qoutes, I also like some of Oscar Wilde

The church is near, but the roads are icy.
The tavern is far, but I shall walk carefully.
--Ukrainian Proverb

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.
--Robert A. Heinlein

"A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation."
- H. H. Munro (Saki) (1870-1916)

"In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and is widely regarded as a bad move."
- Douglas Adams (1952-2001)

"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home."
- Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corporation, 1977

"You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone."
- Al Capone (1899-1947)

"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education."
- Mark Twain (1835-1910)